I’m inhaling from imaginary cigarettes
each time I breathe in …… it speeds up my heart
for a solitary moment of hope
and a too-rapid rise to the peaks that I used to climb
twenty five times every day
my eyes are a quick side-to-side scanning gyration
searching for the source …… quickly …… any source
then a flexing of fingers …… now moist with the sheen
of sweat that an unrequited rush released
© Frank Prem, 2008
270218
Frank Prem Poetry 
Good one! I can relate. 🙂
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reading as a non-smoker it helps you understand something of what it feels like.
c
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A lingering compulsion – even years later.
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Me too! When I walk past it, I lean into the smell, remember the sensation, long for, desire, dream of – and yes, I do still dream of the me who used to light up.
Do we ever get beyond this, or should we always consider ourselves as member of AA who have to say, over and over: My name is Cage, and I am an addict. Forever.
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Hi Cage. Thanks for your comment. It takes a lot to get over an addiction, doesn’t it? I don’t crave any more, but it took a lot of time and effort. Good on you for succeeding so far.
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Thanks Frank. I do still crave, even 9 years after becoming a non-smoker. I don’t drink either, ‘cos that would probably be enough to send me back there. I just have that little urge to …
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just a little, little urge, and then, you’re lost. Good luck with it. 9 years is a fine start.
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Imaginary Cigarette? Reminds me of JOHN GREEN’s teen romance novelTHE FAULT IN OUR STARS where this character named Augustus used to put a cigarette in his mouth but never used to light it. U know why? For here lies the metaphor: The killing thing is in his mouth but you don’t give it the power to kill you.
Here’s my take on imagination. Would love it if you take a read. Not really a similar one. But imagination nonetheless. 🙂 🙂 🙂
https://yourlifeyourchoicesyourways.wordpress.com/2018/02/26/faded-wishes/
Btw, in my rantings, I forgot to mention. It’s a beautiful poem you wrote. 🙂
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